My biggest fear has always been the love of my life falling
out of love of me and finding happiness with someone else.
Maybe I was in too much of fear, that I attracted it.
When I found out, I was devastated.
out of love of me and finding happiness with someone else.
Maybe I was in too much of fear, that I attracted it.
When I found out, I was devastated.
So many questions running around my mind.
We were supposed to get married, what happened?
What happened to us? What happened to all those future planning?
The wedding theme? The kids names we’ve planned?
The kind of house we wanted to live in? The kisses? The I love you’s?
The cuddles and snuggles? What happened?
We were supposed to get married, what happened?
What happened to us? What happened to all those future planning?
The wedding theme? The kids names we’ve planned?
The kind of house we wanted to live in? The kisses? The I love you’s?
The cuddles and snuggles? What happened?
I realised, I was in the midst of a funeral.
Funeral of his feelings for me.
Funeral of his love for me.
All gone. It took me a while to grasp it, to understand it. It wasn’t easy.
I had to bury all my broken dreams and my shattered heart, deep down 6ft underground.
Funeral of his feelings for me.
Funeral of his love for me.
All gone. It took me a while to grasp it, to understand it. It wasn’t easy.
I had to bury all my broken dreams and my shattered heart, deep down 6ft underground.
I saw his pictures with her, happy.
I used to promise him something.
I always wanted him to be happier than the happiest person on Earth,
and maybe I should have added ‘with me’
and silly me I didn’t and maybe the universe did not catch it.
He was the happiest, in those photos with her.
I could hear my heart shattering, literally, loud and clear.
Like the roots were pulled out of the vase full of soil. It hurts.
I couldn’t swallow, couldn’t breathe.
And of course, I have to keep my promise you see.
I decided to back off.
But deep down, I was hoping he would tell me it isn’t him and he only loves me.
But, He didn’t. He kept quiet.
And I understood.
Not a word and that cut me deeper than any wounds I’ve seen in life.
I used to promise him something.
I always wanted him to be happier than the happiest person on Earth,
and maybe I should have added ‘with me’
and silly me I didn’t and maybe the universe did not catch it.
He was the happiest, in those photos with her.
I could hear my heart shattering, literally, loud and clear.
Like the roots were pulled out of the vase full of soil. It hurts.
I couldn’t swallow, couldn’t breathe.
And of course, I have to keep my promise you see.
I decided to back off.
But deep down, I was hoping he would tell me it isn’t him and he only loves me.
But, He didn’t. He kept quiet.
And I understood.
Not a word and that cut me deeper than any wounds I’ve seen in life.
But one thing that was soaring up high was his ego.
His ego that he’s right and what he did isn’t wrong.
He always claims he’s busy and being the understanding girlfriend, I will not disturb him.
Not to bring anybody down, but I am always busy with my career as well.
I still managed to find time for him and thats when i learnt that I am not his top priority
and well in fact not even in his list to begin with.
And I started wondering, ‘who is he?’
I started questioning if this is the person I used to love and wanted to be the father of my child.
It was ugly. I was disgusted to see his face.
This wasn’t the person I fell in Love with.
One thing he has changed in my life is the perception of love.
I’m not going to open doors for love again. It doesn’t exist and it’s no more in my life.
Enough damage and this heart of mine can never take another heartbreak.
It’s been a year, I still cry each time something reminds me of him.
The worst part is that, thoughts about him not only accompanies me during my lonely nights
but also creeps in during the busiest time of the day.
His ego that he’s right and what he did isn’t wrong.
He always claims he’s busy and being the understanding girlfriend, I will not disturb him.
Not to bring anybody down, but I am always busy with my career as well.
I still managed to find time for him and thats when i learnt that I am not his top priority
and well in fact not even in his list to begin with.
And I started wondering, ‘who is he?’
I started questioning if this is the person I used to love and wanted to be the father of my child.
It was ugly. I was disgusted to see his face.
This wasn’t the person I fell in Love with.
One thing he has changed in my life is the perception of love.
I’m not going to open doors for love again. It doesn’t exist and it’s no more in my life.
Enough damage and this heart of mine can never take another heartbreak.
It’s been a year, I still cry each time something reminds me of him.
The worst part is that, thoughts about him not only accompanies me during my lonely nights
but also creeps in during the busiest time of the day.
I don’t believe in this thing called love and maybe even if it exists, it’s not meant for me.
We’ve parted ways and in fact it was never the same path to even begin with.
I don’t wish to lay my eyes on him ever again.
But I pray he’ll be the happiest person on this whole entire world and I mean it.
Take care my love, one thing that was real was my love and never have I ever thought to leave you.
If I ever have the chance again,
I wish I would have never went to that field on that day and would have not met you
cause this pain is just too unbearable.
You be you and I will be me.
May the path we had just remain as memories for us to be cherished.
If I ever have the chance again,
I wish I would have never went to that field on that day and would have not met you
cause this pain is just too unbearable.
You be you and I will be me.
May the path we had just remain as memories for us to be cherished.
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